Weekly SPARK - Experiment 253
Feeling confusion is hidden anger. Feeling pressured is hidden fear.
SPARK EXPERIMENT
Specific Practical Application of Radical Knowledge
Sunday 6 July, 2025
SPARK- Experiment 253
Feeling confusion is hidden anger. Feeling pressured is hidden fear.
(Matrix Code SPARK253.00)
NOTES: Emotionally empowered stories seem so experientially intense that you could believe they are true... so true that you might not question what is actually going on. One resistance to applying Self Observation in your daily life is that it has the power to reveal the gap between having a sensation and any story you attached to it. Suddenly your story has no power. Then you see what your Gremlin has been up to...
Did you ever think you were confused? It can happen when you think you can’t figure something out, for example, when too much information moves too quickly for your mind to satisfyingly sort, or when people interact with each other using shared meanings or jargon that you don’t know. You may also feel confused when trying to follow poorly written ‘do it yourself’ instructions to assemble a furniture kit, or when someone does not do what you expect, or when trying to follow a video to debug a computer app. If it is not okay for you to feel angry, then a sideways story comes together in your mind saying, “I’m confused.” This story disempowers you by sliding you into a ‘dead end’, a self-consuming inner state called ‘being confused’.
Being confused is another way of saying that someone is persecuting you as a victim, and you have not yet been rescued. Being confused is Low Drama. To create High Drama instead of being confused, start by noticing that you sense a feeling or an emotion behind the confusion, the biggest is probably anger. During Phase 1 of the ‘Becoming Unconfused Process’ you admit to yourself that you feel angry. Then without preamble, you say out loud, “I feel angry because…” Examples of the ‘because’ part are: “because that is not said clearly enough for me to understand,” or, “because I don’t like being left out,” or, “because I don’t have enough clarity to create what I want to create,” or, “because that does not make sense to me,” etc.
Once the words, “I feel angry because…” naturally come out of your mouth the moment you sense being confused, you can shift into Phase 2 of Becoming Unconfused by using the energy and information of your now-Conscious Anger to directly and immediately ask for what you want. Start by memorizing a few sample questions, such as, “Are you willing to repeat what you said using different words, please?” Or, “Could you try again as if you are explaining this to someone with a different color brain than you?” (This question uses the helpful distinctions from the Four Brains thoughtmap.) Or, “Could you please read and rephrase these instructions to me?” etc.
Learning to repackage confusion into asking for what you want is the doorway to Phase 3 of Becoming Unconfused, which is to formulate and deliver Transformational Proposals. A Transformational Proposal is a clarity-empowered negotiation that you engage, with an individual or a group, which they can accept, decline, or modify. You skip saying, “I feel angry because…” and you skip over asking a clarifying question. You use your now-Conscious Anger to say, “I propose that we spend the first five minutes of each meeting deepening and clarifying our context to avoid confusions that arise when working in a mixed context. Any Resistance? 1. 2. 3.”
The other distinction in this S.P.A.R.K. is about feeling ‘pressured’. Did you ever think someone was pressuring you? Feeling ‘pressured’ is Low Drama. To create High Drama instead of feeling pressured, start by using Self Observation to notice that you sense a feeling or an emotion behind your victim story, “I am being pressured. You are pressuring me!” The biggest feeling is usually fear. Phase 1 of the ‘Becoming Unpressured Process’ starts by noticing each instance the “I am being pressured,” story comes into your awareness, and immediately saying out loud, “I feel scared because…” Examples of the ‘because’ part are: “because I don’t know how to do this,” or, “because I might make a mistake and you might judge or criticize me,” or, “because I don’t want to work as hard or as fast as I think you want me to work, and I might disappoint you,” or, “because I don’t think I am as capable as you think I am and I don’t want to do the experiment of adopting your perceptions about my potentials,” etc.
Phase 2 of the Becoming Unpressured Process is to use your now-Conscious Fear to ask questions, such as, “Could you please explain what you see in me that makes you think I can do what you suggest?” Or, “Why is it so important to you that it be done the way you describe?” or, “I can’t do this myself and I don’t have a Team…” etc. Phase 3 of the Becoming Unpressured Process is to use the intelligence and energy of your now-conscious fear to make Transformational Proposals, such as, “I propose that you bring me through the Emotional Healing Processes (EHP) behind why I don’t have a Team, or why I don’t think I can manage this much money, or this much energy.”
EXPERIMENTS:
SPARK253.01 Instead of saying, “I’m confused,” say “I feel angry because…” Practice saying this for 4 weeks, immediately doing any EHPs that may arise for you.
SPARK253.02 Consciously use the unconscious anger behind your ‘confusion’ Survival Strategy (Box 13) to make valuable proposals. Study the Proposals and Transformational Proposals websites, then ask your Possibility Team to frame up a half-hour of feedback and coaching while you practice using anger 3 weeks in a row.
SPARK253.03 Instead of saying, “You are pressuring me,” say, “I feel scared because…” Practice saying this for 4 weeks, immediately doing any EHPs that may arise for you. Joining Fear Club will help you practically befriend and apply your fears.
SPARK253.04 Consciously use the unconscious fear behind your ‘I am being pressured’ Survival Strategy to make valuable proposals. Study the Proposals and Transformational Proposals websites, then ask your Possibility Team to frame up a half-hour of feedback and coaching to practice using your fear 3 weeks in a row.
SPARK253.05 Apply Self Observation whenever a feeling or emotion tries to attach itself to a story. Self Observation is the central practice in Archan Adulthood. Self Observation empowers you to detect the difference between feelings and emotions. Feelings are for handling things. Emotions are for healing things. The Box tries to preserve itself by using Is Glue to attach stories to feelings or emotions as a way to justify and fortify your Box’s Survival Strategy. This makes sense if you wish to live in the world that is perceived by your Box. However, if you want to step out of your protective chrysalis and enter the adulthood Path of authentic initiatory processes (that has no top end), then you will need to get good at having feelings and emotions with no story attached. You can tell that you are succeeding at separating emotions from stories when it seems like your world starts disintegrating, and coming apart at the seams. Self Observation will help you study the amazing transformational mechanics of human thoughtware upgrade. You are then free to be in awe, and improvise.
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Unconfused and unpressured,
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